Monday, December 31, 2012
Often, Tabby's doctor has offered to give her a break. Every other time, Tabby's said she could handle it. This time, however, we recognized that she needed a break. Her body stopped recovering between chemotherapy sessions, and I wasn't sure if the cure was hurting her worse than the disease. So this time, she said she needed the break. The doctor agreed. She needs to recover.
So here's the long and the short of what's happening for now: First, no round 14. Chemo stops now. No more nulasta, no more cisplaten, no more beating her to death with this stuff...For now. Tabby will go back for another CT scan in February to see if the tumors have grown or stayed the same, and we'll figure out what to do from there.
The good news is, she will have time to recover, to purge the poison from her body. She'll rest, regain some of her strength, and maybe her appetite again. There will be no three-to-four days of hell while nulasta makes her bones ache. We might be able to get somewhat caught up on the mounting medical bills. But there is a down side. First, we don't know what stopping treatment, even for a month, will do. It could do nothing. It could spiral out of control. It could do a number of things that I don't want to think about.
So here we are...About to begin the new year. In fact, it's the last day of 2012, and we're looking forward with uncertainty. We don't know what 2013 will bring, only that with uncertainty comes even a glimmer of hope.
Again, and again and again, thank you to everyone who has wished Tabby well, sent gifts, bought copies of DROPLETS, and kept us in your thoughts and prayers. Every message she receives, every card, gives her strength and courage. I'll let you know what happens in February. Until then, please keep her and our girls in your thoughts. Make no mistake, this is stage 4-b cancer. This literally is a fight for her life. The odds are long and stacked against her. But she's going to keep fighting.